If I lived in FatLand (to the tune of "If I Were a Rich Man)

What would I do if I lived in FatLand?  Would be on one of the FatLand volleyball teams. Would be a freelance editor/grammar consultant. Would keep agitating for more trains. Would visit the Adult Playground, especially for the swings.

Would go chunky dunking in a lake or river. Would walk in woods a lot. Would eat lots of pasta with homemade sauces. Would visit the FatLand cows. Would eat lots of ice cream. Would go to cafes and sit outside. Would watch lots of sunsets.

Would walk through lots of woods during autumn. Would make decorations from leaves and berries. Would howl and dance during the full moon.

Would tie my significant other down and tickle his feet with a feather.

Would serve on the FatLand Board as often as its rules allowed.